Judas Asparagus – OMG

Children’s Bible in a Nutshell

October 14, 2008 by admin Leave a Comment

A quick overview of the Bible (tongue-in-cheek). A child was told to write a book report on the entire Bible.

Now I belong to Jesus

How 'bout you? What kind of commitment did YOU make to Jesus? PIC:Children-at-play.Darrell Creswell

Verses I have written - poetry, satire, and make-believe PIC:Megan Menegay.Unsplash

Well said...quotes

"Is the Word of Jesus enough for you, today?"...and other quotes. PIC: Gertler Cardboard Sculptures

Oh what a day that will be!

Wow! To enter into the Kingdom of God - freely as His redeemed child. No cringing in shame, no burden of sinfulness before Almighty Holy God. I can only imagine.

Jesus, the second man, is the Lord from Heaven

"The first man is of the earth, earthy; the second man is the Lord from heaven.” In 1 Corinthians 15:47 the Apostle Paul explained that Jesus, while on earth, was absolutely God-man. He was not a mere man, ever.

There Is Only One God

Getting tired of people flippantly saying, ¨Oh my god!¨ Ever wonder who their ¨god¨ is!? Does that ¨god¨ know he is ¨theirs¨? Do you say that? We are quite the god-makers, are we not! What do you mean…“your God”?

God Is Not Distant

God is not some far away, distant-from-you, dis-concerned bubble of energy, inside some aura of mist on a mysterious planet far far away…. “And the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore” –Psalm 121:8

When it comes to God, who wants mere opinions?

When talking “God” and “Truth” – I really do not care what you think. You should not care what I think. What matters is “what God thinks”.

Lost I Came To Him

Oh the wonder of that love of our fathomless Creator, to save me in spite of my self-centered soul. Lost and rebellious, He chose me. Pursued and wooed, what mystery – grace. I said yes to Creator God. To know…

Time as it really is

Since Heaven is not regulated by time, the passage of time on earth is a separate event. *We will all step out of time together – into God’s presence, with no “time lag”,…The time it takes to go from earth to God's presence - is instant. There is no waiting around in the next dimension for earth time to finish, no midway point of gathering, no Purgatory. It will be an instantaneous experience for all mankind that ever lived. At the moment of death, our soul instantly leaves....

No Tolerance for Error

God is not sloppy nor wishy-washy.... There is no room at all – for error – when it comes to being right with God. You are either all in, or you are all out. Are you sure you’re in?

Simple View of Life

A simple view of everything. God of Everything that is – created everything. We are very fortunate that He is loving and kind, and really, really wants us.

Ashamed of Yourself?

Ever done something you are ashamed of? Come on now, you’re sitting there by yourself – ‘fess-up. Nobody listenin’ to your brain confess. So... Yes? Scenario: “You have? What!?

Being Christian

What's it like these days to be a Christian? Really a Christian. For many, what the Bible teaches is generally okay, but, when it comes to certain specificities, what it says, they reason, needs to be interpreted in the light of today's enlightened realities. But -- will that work in - The End - when we stand before Him, physically? Stop and think about that Day.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the fool’s day. Tomorrow may never come. I may not get older. This may be it. 3.18.2017

Vortex of Good & Evil

As mere humans, we are engulfed in the vortex of battle between good and evil. We must remember – it is God who created us, not we ourselves.

What God has going on with us here on this planet

God downloaded to earth ...inserted Himself into our history. Jesus came to earth in order to satisfy the Courts of Heaven for our freedom.

Cognitive Dissonance

...that extreme feeling of discomfort some folks get when their core belief is challenged or contradicted. What they think (“cognitive”) is rattled (dissonance) by what other evidences purport to be true – in direct conflict with what they hold to be “true”.

Actually Try To Do The Deed

“It’s not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of deeds could have done better."

What God Did for Man

…The Simple Gospel of Jesus Christ. God walked the earth as a man. Have you ever wondered how it all got started – the universe, the earth, nature, animals, you and your “like”, mankind?

The Bible is “able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation”

Do you honestly want to know how to get right with God? Jesus promised He would save us for an eternity of only good, nothing bad.

Vile To Jesus (8,476)
God allows us total freedom to do whatever the hell we want. We love to be freeeeee! That tends to give us such a sense of "yippeeee!" that, as a consequence... our life can kind of get out of control.In the grip of our "yippeeee" lifestyle, we forget God and His ways. It's just too […]
Ashamed of Yourself? (3,194)
Have you ever done something you are ashamed of? God does not overlook and excuse sin (Romans 1: verse 18). Never has. Never will. However, Jesus dealt with the sins of others in a much more merciful manner than we tend to do with our self and our sins - and the sins of others. […]
The Passion Translation (TPT) and why not to use it (3,063)
The translation done by Brian Simmons, called The Passion (TPT), is not a faithful translation of the original. It is very much fraught with misleading words Simmons adds into the text (..."it is at least 50% longer than the original"). Good Christians should want to go to more accurate translations, and not ever use this deviant […]
Getting Born Again (1,659)
Jesus said, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.” In God's legal system, all of mankind is condemned to hell because we are naturally unable to be holy ["holy" = without sin]. He cannot have sin in His Kingdom. Makes sense: He is holy! […]
This is God speaking (1,649)
This is a satire about the way God might discuss theology with the NAR-types. Don't get all in a huff. It's satire!
Jesus Knows Your Thoughts (1,548)
God is able to see into the innermost parts of your heart. He knows what you feel. He knows what you want. He knows your thoughts. Even before you speak a word -- He knows what you are going to say! God hears me as I speak to him silently in my mind - in […]
That Moment In Time (1,517)
There is a certain moment in time when everything changes, when a mere human is transformed by God into a completely different type of human. That moment changes everything for that person. Nothing is the same anymore. A new creature has been born – really and truly “born again” into new life in Christ. This […]
That Day of Judgement (1,473)
References to ¨that day¨ - That Day of Judgement at the end of the age.
Befuddled and Besmirched (1,443)
Is your "happy" gone? What's your problem? We all have sin we should be working on. But we do not have to continue in our sin, vile to Jesus. I try to practice admitting I was wrong. We can turn to God in prayer, confess it all, repent of it all....
Signs of an unrepentant heart (1,298)
The unrepentant heart makes excuses for sin (vile things before God). What do I support - that is "not of God"? ...in my personal practices, in my politics, in my relationships, in my mind and heart? We rationalize so well, we fool ourselves! What does your life "evidence"?
Inexplicable Joy (1,260)
Heaven is a joyful place. That is hard for me to imagine... Everywhere I look around me, I see so many problems, issues and unresolved conflicts. But in heaven, they won't exist anymore. There will only be joy because my sins have been paid for by the blood of Jesus Christ. One of the main […]
Following (1,256)
Where' you going? Are you truly "following" Christ? This is what it means to be "a follower" of the real Jesus Christ...
God’s System of Justice (1,237)
Let’s look at the real God and His very real system of justice. Let’s look at this from within what His book tells us. These are the parts of God’s system:
Saving Knowledge (1,223)
There is a saving knowledge of Christ, and there is a false knowledge about Christ. One connects you to God and saves you. The other does not lead to Creator God. Do you know the difference?
God Damned “Believers” (1,206)
Almighty God has provided a very specific justice system to clear our name and our well-deserved verdict of "Guilty". He has deemed that through a genuine faith in Jesus Christ - the sacrifice of His Son can make us worthy. Is your faith genuinely in the genuine Jesus? Have you been declared "worthy", or are […]
The Confuscating John Pavlovitz (1,188)
This post is a warning to the Church against false teachers. In this day of instant communication, rarely deeply thought through, we need to be careful who we listen to. We need to be warned about these wolves in sheep's clothing.Jesus named names. The Apostle Paul named names. False teachers spout a lot of their […]
The Other Side (1,186)
There is a world of difference between Christ and Mohammed, between following the teachings of Christ - and following the teachings of Mohammed. Choosing Christ takes you up a very different pathway and you end-up very far from where the pathway of Islam takes you down.
My Heinous Heinous Ways (1,173)
There is a tendency to think that - because I have sinned, therefore God does not like me, doesn't want me, and, boy is He miffed at me! But that is not what the Bible teaches. That is not what Jesus practiced. So why are folks so condemning of people who fail!? At this time […]
Me, When I Die, still in sin (1,170)
What difference does it make - who I am when I die? An eternal difference!
Practicing Sin, Not Following Christ (1,159)
Are you practicing sin? Is there sin you constantly practice? Have you grown accustomed to accepting ["your" sin] as okay with God? Are you okay with the practices of your life? Scripture teaches us very clearly what is obviously ...NOT following Christ. In fact, we are warned that "that those who practice such things will […]
Examples of false doctrines (1,157)
Examples of false doctrines to stay away from.
False Prophets (1,134)
"You may be asking yourselves, “How can we tell if a prophet’s message really comes from the Lord?”" -Deuteronomy 18:21. How can we distinguish the true from the false?
Following Someone (1,129)
Are you ready to meet your Maker? Have you considered the possibility that someday God might reject you? Do you truly "follow" Him?
Why Believe Such Stupididiotic Things?! (1,096)
People around you say all kinds of stupididiotic things about God. Have you put your faith in THAT?
Me, When I Die, Forgiven (1,076)
Do you know what will stand in the Court of God in His Holy Kingdom? What will not? God shows us in the Bible - what's what. What we think, well, how can that count for much in His infinite knowledge?

Children’s Bible in a Nutshell

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